(The curtain rises to reveal Dark Land and the title is shown. Luigi and Princess are at the Mushroom Land Central Library.)

Luigi: Hey, Princess, I think I found it!

(Luigi hands a map to Princess.)

Princess: Quick Luigi, let me see!

(Princess looks at the map.)

Princess: Luigi, you’ve done it! I’ve been searching for this map to the Doom Dancer Music Box for years! Come on, we gotta tell Mario! This could be the beginning of the end of King Koopa!

(They meet up with Mario and Toad at Toad’s house and study the map.)

Princess: The Doom Dancer Music Box is said to possess great magical powers!

(Princess imagines the Koopas dancing to the music box.)

Princess: Crank it fast, and it makes everybody dance faster and faster! Crank it slow, and it makes them slow down and stop!

Mario: Hey, would could use this Doom Dancer to keep King Koopa and his brat  pack under control! Let’s go get it!

Princess: It’s hidden in Dark Land’s Temple of Gloom!

Luigi: Dark Land? Dark Land is Koopa’s home kingdom! Besides, I uh, I hate dancing!

Mario: Relax Luigi, we can do it! Just follow my lead!

(They run to a warp pipe outside with a skull on it.)

Luigi: *gulp* Why do I get the feeling this trip could be dangerous to my health?

(Mario jumps onto the pipe.)

Mario: When we get the Doom Dancer it’ll be a lot more hazardous for Koopa! C’mon, let’s boogie!

(Mario jumps into the pipe followed by Toad, Princess, and nervous Luigi. They come out of a pipe in a cave in Dark Land and land on each other in a pile.)

Luigi: Hey, who’s standing on my foot?

Mario: Quiet! Ya wanna wake the dead? You don’t want Koopa to find out we’re in his kingdom, do ya?

(A Dry Bones who was behind some blocks hears them. Meanwhile, at Castle Koopa, Bully, Big Mouth, and Cheatsy are playing darts on a Mario dartboard. Koopa is sitting on his throne but he is sick and has a hot water bottle attached to his head and is spraying medicine into his mouth. The Dry Bones comes out of a warp pipe, walks up to Koopa, and whispers something to him.)

Koopa: Lowba! Lowba! You dummy mummy can’t see I got a cold?

(The Dry Bones whispers to Koopa again, causing him to jump out his throne.)

Koopa: What? Those besky blumbers are here in Dark Land?

Big Mouth: Besky blumbers? What are bbbbesky bbbblumbers?

Koopa: Not besky blumbers, Big Mouth! Pesky plumbers!

Cheatsy: Whew, that’s a relief! If it was pesky plumbers, we’d really be in trouble!

Koopa: We are in trouble! It’s the Mario Bros. and you three gotta stop ‘em!

Bully: Right, King Dad! Anything you say! We’ll stop those Mario Bros.!

Koopa: Then don’t just stand there! Bones here will show you their trail! Follow that mummy!

(They follow Dry Bones through the pipe. Meanwhile, Mario and co. have reached a chasm with fire at the bottom.)

Luigi: Whoah, stop the music!

(The background music stops.)

Luigi: We can’t jump that far!

Mario: A Mario Brother never says can’t, Luigi!

(Toad looks up and points to some blocks.)

Toad: Woah, try blasting those blocks, Mario!

Mario: Start the music!

(The music starts up again as Mario jumps into the air and pulls out his plunger. He sticks it onto a wall and bounces off of it to jump even higher and bashes a couple of blocks in midair. Four Super Leaves come out of them. They cheer at Mario and everyone grabs a Leaf and gains raccoon power. They then fly across the chasm and end up in a room with those pointy things from the Chocolate Fortress in Mario World. They run through it and avoid getting hurt, but at the end of the room two Bowser statues shoot lasers at them and
they loose their raccoon power.)

Mario: We’re almost to the Temple of Gloom!

(They find the temple but the grounds are surrounded by several Dry Bones.)

Mario: Dry Bones troopas! Let’s shake, rattle, and roll these boneheads!

(They start to jump on them. Mario jumps on one and it shatters.)

Mario: Gotcha!

(It reforms.)

Mario: *gulp* I don’t gotcha!

Princess: Those turtles take a lickin’ and come back kickin’! What now?

Mario: Sock a block!

They all jump into the air and start bashing blocks. The debris from the blocks cover all of the Dry Bones.

Mario: Temple of Gloom, here we come!

(They run inside and dodge a room full of a Bowser statues. The Koopa Kids have reached the temple and are outside near the entrance.)

Big Mouth: These Marios are tough! Whadda ya think they’re up to? The nerve of these guys, sneaking into Dark Land, reminds me of-

(Bully covers his mouth.)

Cheatsy: I hate sneaky, unless I’m doing the sneaking! Whatever those Mario Bros. are up to, we’ve gotta stop!

(They run into the temple and spy on Mario and co.)

Princess: According to our map, the Doom Dancer is in the inner temple, right through that door!

Big Mouth: They have a map, to the Doom Dancer Music Box!

Bully: King Dad always said the Doom Dancer was just a legend!

Big Mouth: No, it must be true! If Mario gets it, we’ll be doomed for good! He’ll control everything!

(Bully picks up Big Mouth and runs to the entrance.)

Cheatsy: No way! We’ll let Mario find it! Then we’ll snatch it away from him!

Big Mouth: Yeah, let’s do an ambush!

Bully: Good idea, give me your string!

Big Mouth: Ah, not my favorite string, it’s invaluable! Oh, there’s a story behind this string! Our great grand Koopa mama-

(Bully holds Big Mouth and Cheatsy takes the string from Big Mouth. Cheatsy ties the sting to two posts on opposite ends of the entrance.)

Cheatsy: Now we’re sure the Mario Bros. will have a pleasant trip in Dark Land! A ha ha ha!

(In the temple, Mario and co. have found the Doom Dancer on a podium.)

Princess: It’s really here!

(Mario runs up and grabs it, only to be attacked by Bob-ombs, fireballs, and wrenches on his way back.)

Princess: Look out, Mario, a Thwomp!

(A Thwomp comes down onto Mario but he runs away just in time. A Boom Boom starts to chases them. They scream and run out of the temple. They trip on the string at the entrance and the Doom Dancer goes flying out of Mario’s hands.)

Princess: Oh no!

Big Mouth: I got it, I got it! Big Mouth Koopa calls to the ball, the crowd roars!

(Cheatsy pushes him out of the way.)

Cheatsy: No, I got it!

(Bully picks up Cheatsy and throws him away.)

Bully: Oh yeah, well now I got it!

(Bully catches it and everyone just stares at him.)

Big Mouth: Uh, Bully brother, old buddy old pal! That thing doesn’t work on me and Cheatsy, does it? I mean, you wouldn’t make your favorite brother dance, would ya?

(Bully starts to play it and everyone else starts to dance.)

Bully: Heh heh heh heh, now let’s try it slow!

(Bully plays a slower tune and everyone slows down.)

Bully: Heh heh heh ha ha, now let’s try a march!

(Bully plays a different tune and everyone starts to march in a line.)

Bully: Ha ha ha ha! Meet King Bully Koopa, the new master of Dark Land!

(Bully continues to make everyone march all the way back to Koopa’s throne room. He stops playing and runs up to Koopa.)

Koopa: The Doom Dancer Music Box! Good work, Koopalings! Let me try it, Bully!

Bully: You’ve gotta be kidding us, King Dad! I’m gonna rule the entire world, starting with you!

(Bully plays the march tune but Koopa doesn’t dance.)

Koopa: What’s that? My ears are stuffed up, I can’t hear you, speak up!

(Bully stops.)

Bully: *gulp* He can’t hear me?

Cheatsy: Yeah, Bully! That means you can’t control him!

Koopa: Give it to me!

(Bully hands over the Doom Dancer.)

Koopa: Do the Koopa! Heh heh heh heh heh heh!

(Koopa plays it and everyone else starts to dance.)

Princess: Do you suppose he takes requests?

Luigi: I hate to dance!

Bully: King Dad is gonna pay for this!

Big Mouth: Yeah, dancing lessons are expensive!

Koopa: Oh how I love this song! Heh heh heh heh! I can make the whole Mushroom Kingdom dance to their doom!

(The doomship flies over the Mushroom Kingdom and King Koopa, Mario, Luigi, Princess, Toad and all the Koopalings are onboard on the deck.)

Koopa: Do the Koopa!

(The song “Do the Koopa” starts. First everyone on the doomship dances. Next some Mushrooms start to dance. Inside the doomship, Paragoombas and Paratroopas are dancing too. Next, people in Giant Land start dancing too. Even in Desert Land, a sphinx, the trees, and the Angry Sun dance. And back in the Mushroom Kingdom, some Paragoombas and trees dance. The song ends although Koopa is still playing the Doom Dancer.)

Do the Koopa

Do the Koopa
Rip the Koopa
Do the loop de loopa
Or you’ll be a party pooper
Everybody do the Koopa
Everybody shout and pout
Everybody do the Koopa
Everybody shake your snouts
Everybody do the Koopa
Everybody shake your scales
Everybody do the Koopa
Everybody wag your tails
Do the Koopa
Rip the Koopa
Do the  loop de loopa
Or you’ll be a party pooper
Everybody do the Koopa
Once you start you can’t stop
Everybody do the Koopa
Rock hop flop and drop
And rock hop flop until you drop drop drop
Do the Koopa
Rip the Koopa
Do the Koopa

Koopa: This is hard work! My arm is getting tired!

Mario: Hey, Luigi, ya got any plumber’s putty on ya?

(Luigi pulls a tube of plumber’s putty out of his pocket and hands it to Mario, who sticks some in his ears.)

Luigi: Hey Mario, good thinking!

Mario: What?

Luigi: Hey Mario!

(Mario covers Luigi’s mouth and pretends to dance over to Koopa.)

Koopa: Hey, getting tired? Ready to bow down and kiss my feet?

(Mario goes right next to Koopa.)

Mario: Ha ha, no way Koopa!

(Mario jumps at Koopa and the Doom Dancer goes flying, but Mario catches it. Bully charges into Mario and it goes flying again.)

Koopa: I got it! I got it!

Luigi: Heads up, Toad!

(Luigi jumps onto Toad’s head and into the air and grabs onto the Doom Dancer the same time as Koopa. They land and Luigi and Toad fight over the Doom Dancer with Koopa in a tug ‘o war kind of fight. The crank breaks off and Koopa gets a hold of the Doom Dancer.

Koopa: I gob it, I really gob it! The Doom Dancer is mine!

Toad: Yeah, but we got the crank!

(Koopa sticks his claw where the crank goes and it gets stuck.)

Koopa: My claw’s stuck!

Big Mouth: I’ll help you, daddy dearest!

(Big Mouth pulls on the Doom Dancer with the help of Bully and Cheatsy. It comes off but goes flying over the edge of the doomship. It lands on top of a Goomba and breaks.)

Koopa: It's all smashed! I’m getting steamed!

(Smoke comes out of Koopa's nostrils and steam comes out of his hot water bottle.)

Mario: I think that’s our cue to leave!

(Bully and Koopa start to yell at each other.)

Bully: No it’s your fault!

Koopa: Now look what you’ve done! Boy, am I getting angry! You ever seen me angry? Well, you’re gonna see it, watch out!

Mario: Ah, sounds like the Koopas are back to playing their old kind of music!

(Mario and co. jump into a pipe. The curtain falls.)

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